Food Writer Conquers Stage Fright at 60, Finds Joy

The food writer who spent a lifetime saying no to public appearances just said yes three times in two weeks, and he can't quite believe what happened next.

Tony Jackman, a South African food editor and cookbook author, turned down countless invitations to demonstrate recipes or speak publicly about his work. The idea of standing in front of strangers terrified him. He'd rather write the cookbook and let someone else do the talking.

But something shifted this year. When host Pippa Smith invited him to cook and chat with guests at her Constantia home, he accepted. A decade earlier, he'd turned down the exact same invitation.

The event brought together 16 women in Smith's beautiful Cape Town kitchen, complete with what Jackman lovingly calls a "kitchen peninsula" instead of an island. They cooked his parmesan gem squash recipe together. Smith interviewed him expertly while he chopped and stirred.

"I loved every minute of it," Jackman wrote afterward. "Yes, the scared kid at the back of the classroom loved, loved, loved being in front of these people."

The Constantia lunch followed a cooking demo in Kenton-on-Sea and preceded a full cooking workshop weekend at the Karoo Art Hotel in Barrydale. Each time, the nerves flooded back beforehand. Each time, the experience proved better than he imagined.

Why This Inspires

Jackman's journey shows that growth doesn't have an age limit. He's not magically cured of his anxiety. In photos from the events, his face still looks worried and contemplative even when he's having fun inside. People still ask him "what's wrong?" when he's simply concentrating.

But he keeps showing up anyway. He's inching closer, event by event, to that imagined future where chatting with strangers feels natural. Where he might even look forward to it.

The people at his workshops threw themselves into cooking and conversation. They shared stories about their fascinating lives. A Durban urban designer. A photographer who captures water. A writer who makes killer coleslaw. They had a grand time together, completely unaware of the internal battle their instructor had won just by walking through the door.

Now Jackman finds himself looking forward to his next appearance at Woordfees in Stellenbosch. Three events down, unscathed. Maybe this scary thing isn't so scary after all.

The best part? He's doing it for himself, not despite his fear but alongside it, proving that courage isn't the absence of worry but the choice to keep going anyway.