Man Turns Grief Into 1,000 Meetups Fighting Loneliness

Dean Perryman's best friend Rob Clancy was the funniest guy in any room, the person everyone wanted at their gathering. When Rob died by suicide at 29 in November 2025, Dean couldn't shake one haunting thought: he wished Rob had felt safe enough to talk about his struggles.

So Dean gave himself a challenge. One month after losing Rob, he decided to go to a pub every single day, wearing a bright orange top so people could spot him easily.

His goal was simple: have conversations. Talk about his grief, sure, but also be there if anyone else needed to chat.

It took just four days for someone to show up. "I thought, what am I good at? I'm okay at talking to strangers, and I'm good at drinking beer," Dean says. "So if I go to the pub, that seems like a place that Rob might have actually gone to if he was ever having a low moment."

In January, on what would have been Rob's 30th birthday, Dean invited others to host their own orange-topped meetups. He called it Empty Chairs, hoping to give even one person the chance to open up in a way Rob never felt he could.

The response stunned him. In just under eight months, Empty Chairs has held 1,000 meetups in locations spanning from the UK to Colombia, the Falkland Islands, and the United Arab Emirates.

Every event follows the same format: completely free, no pressure to share anything personal, and people can stay for five minutes or the whole session. "It really is: go to the venue, look for the person wearing bright orange, and sit down and have a conversation," Dean explains.

He's clear that Empty Chairs isn't crisis support (anyone in urgent need should contact Samaritans or emergency services). Instead, it creates space for real human connection.

Why This Inspires

Dean struggled to process his grief at first. But Empty Chairs became an unexpected outlet, letting him talk openly about Rob and how he was doing. "To now be in a position where it feels as though we might be able to create a legacy for Rob is just incredible, and more than I could ever have hoped for," he says.

The initiative is also breathing new life into pubs as community hubs. Dean believes these spaces have always been where honest conversations should happen; sometimes people just need a bright orange shirt to make it easier.

Now Dean is launching "Matchdays" meetups before Southend United home games, honoring Rob's love of sport. His dream? Empty Chairs at every football ground in the country.

"Strangers are so much kinder than we give them credit for," Dean says. "The one thing I hear so much is 'Oh, I would have just stayed at home alone tonight.' And to know that this has come from something that was personally the lowest point of my life is so beautiful."