Mom's Love for Daughter Grew After Perinatal Depression

Molly didn't feel the instant rush of love people promised when her daughter was born, and that terrified her.

The 31-year-old Australian mom had battled treatment-resistant depression before pregnancy, cycling through six different antidepressants to find one that worked. She stopped medication seven months before conceiving, hoping for a fresh start.

Instead, three days after giving birth, that familiar heaviness returned. Molly felt protective of her baby but not connected. When her three-week-old daughter screamed during a car ride, Molly thought her child deserved a better mom.

"I would try and sing to her, and then I would cry, because I still wouldn't feel anything," she told ABC Australia. The guilt of not feeling that bond made everything worse.

Molly couldn't sleep even when exhausted. She stopped talking and eating much. When friends asked if she was loving motherhood, she said yes even though it felt like a lie.

Her maternal health nurse connected her with a GP who created a mental health care plan. At four months postpartum, Molly finally got into therapy. The psychologist asked her to bring her daughter to some sessions and simply watched them interact.

"She could reassure me by saying, 'Look at the way she responds to you and the way she looks at you, you have a really good bond,'" Molly said. That outside perspective helped quiet her worst fears about damaging her daughter's attachment.

The turning point came during a family trip to the Philippines when her daughter was five months old. On an island-hopping adventure, Molly watched her baby smile and wave at everyone, clearly delighting in the experience.

"I remember looking at her and being really proud and happy," she said. "I remember thinking I had more of a bond with her."

Sunny's Take

Today, Molly can barely remember what those early months felt like because her love for her daughter has become so central to her life. She now enjoys spending time with her child more than anything else and is rethinking her work schedule to maximize those moments together.

Her journey reminds us that bonding doesn't always happen on a prescribed timeline, and struggling doesn't mean failing. Sometimes the deepest connections take patience, professional support, and the courage to be honest about the hard parts.

Molly's greatest joy now is simply being her daughter's mom.