Stanford: One Question Opens Closed Minds

What if changing someone's mind didn't require winning an argument but just asking a simple question?

Stanford researchers found that curiosity might be the secret weapon we've been missing in our increasingly divided world. When people disagree, especially on topics they feel strongly about, we usually try to bombard them with facts and logic. Psychology shows this almost never works.

Two Stanford studies examined what happens when people ask questions like "Could you tell me more about that?" during debates. The results surprised even the researchers.

People who were asked to elaborate on their views didn't dig in deeper. Instead, they became more open-minded and viewed the person asking questions more positively. They even formed more favorable opinions about others who shared the questioner's perspective.

The magic ingredient is genuine interest. When researchers added phrases like "I was interested in what you're saying. Can you tell me more about how you came to that conclusion?" something remarkable happened. Not only did the person being questioned become more receptive, but the questioner also developed more favorable attitudes toward the opposing viewpoint.

The University of Haifa found similar results. Their studies showed that high-quality listening lowered people's prejudices and made them less certain that their attitude was the only correct one.

Why This Inspires

Dartmouth cognitive scientist Thalia Wheatley studies curiosity in relationships and discovered it creates common ground where none existed before. "Curiosity really creates common ground across brains, just by virtue of having the intellectual humility to say, 'OK, I thought it was like this, but what do you think?' And being willing to change your mind," she explained.

This approach might seem counterintuitive. We assume letting people talk more about their beliefs will only strengthen those beliefs. But research proves the opposite happens.

The key is moving from one-way broadcasting to two-way conversation. Ranting on social media or delivering monologues rarely changes minds. Small group discussions and one-on-one conversations create space for genuine curiosity to work its magic.

Of course, some views may be too harmful to engage with curious questions. But even in difficult conversations, curiosity often succeeds where argument fails.

The next time you face a seemingly impossible disagreement, try swapping facts for questions and watch what unfolds.