Hawaii Lantern Ceremony Brings 28 Years of Healing

Standing knee-deep in the Pacific Ocean as sunset paints the sky, Jacob Kam lights candles in floating lanterns while thousands of families prepare to say goodbye to loved ones. It's a moment he calls "chicken skin," Hawaii's term for the kind of experience that gives you goosebumps.

The 28th annual Shinnyo Lantern Floating Hawaii ceremony will draw thousands to Ala Moana Beach this Memorial Day. The free event honors fallen service members and loved ones as glowing lanterns drift across the ocean, each carrying handwritten messages to those who have passed.

Kam first attended as a University of Hawaii student over a decade ago, shortly after surviving cancer. Watching thousands of lanterns glow against the darkening water gave him something rare: complete peace in a chaotic world.

"It's this serene calm that I don't think comes around too much nowadays," he said. "That's really more precious now."

Years later, that single moment turned into action. When the ceremony returned to the beach after three years of pandemic broadcasts, Kam signed up to volunteer. His mother, Betty Lou, joined him the following year.

Now they spend Memorial Day helping families navigate grief. Betty Lou sits with people in tents as they decorate their lanterns, offering tissues and space when tears come. Sometimes she just steps aside and lets families feel what they need to feel.

"Some people are still torn with grief and memories," she said. "You share a moment with them."

Sunny's Take

The real magic happens at the shoreline. As Betty Lou lights candles in lanterns she helped families decorate hours earlier, people recognize her. They stop to say thank you for witnessing their pain and their love.

"That is the chicken skin moment," she said. "When somebody says, 'You helped me.'"

The ceremony reflects a Buddhist teaching about many rivers flowing into one ocean. Standing among volunteers and families from every background, all sharing the same purpose, Betty Lou feels that truth come alive.

After the ceremony, volunteers collect the lanterns to refurbish them for next year. The same physical lanterns return to the water season after season, carrying new messages to the departed. It's a circle of remembrance that grows more meaningful with time.

For Kam and his mother, Memorial Day now means something different than it did before. It's not just a day off or even just a day of remembrance. It's the day they stand together in the ocean, lighting candles for strangers who become friends in their shared grief and healing.